Vietnam Hearts Korea

Having been away from Seoul for a few months now, I tend to find myself "homesick" for Korea these days. In addition to missing friends and loved ones, I often have kimchi cravings and strange desires to jam out to K-Pop. I yearn to hear the fluid sounds of the Korean language and go shopping for clothes and cosmetics in the subway stations. There are a lot of things I miss about my second home, but fortunately for me, Vietnam (my current location) has a Korean obsession of their own.

When I arrived here back in January, one of the first things I did was spent a few days wandering around my neighborhood. I found that I lived in a really cool area with lots of Vietnamese character. But, as I passed multiple beauty salons, I couldn't help but notice the faces on the sign boards and the posters covering the windows. These guys looked familiar and it didn't take long to recognize them from Korean dramas and movies. What was this? I wasn't sure but I have to admit that seeing the faces added a bit of familiarity to the unknown around me.

I spent most of my first few nights in my apartment, not yet feeling confident enough to explore the city after sunset by myself. My TV was often turned to MTV Vietnam where a variety of music videos played. Strangely enough, the majority of them were Korean and American, while only a few of them were Vietnamese. It was a bit surprising to see that when the Korean music videos played, there were no subtitles. Despite the language differences, Vietnamese love their K-pop. (And who wouldn't?) I've had some friends who teach here tell me that their students are engrossed with groups like Girl's Generation and 2PM. There has been enough demand that some groups have had concerts here in Vietnam. 2NE1 had a big turnout, as did Super Junior, whose fans fainted or broke down into emotional outbursts upon seeing the group.

2NE1 had a big turnout at their concert in Vietnam last year. (Photo credit: AFamily)

When I wasn't in the mood for MTV Vietnam, I'd surf through the channels, stopping every once in a while on an interesting looking show. I found quite a few Korean dramas but noticed that they never used subtitles. Instead, the dialogue would be dubbed over by a single voice, often female and emotionless. I imagined that it would be quite boring to watch a drama with only one voice dubbing all of the characters' lines, but I guess the Vietnamese are okay with it.

I knew that the Hallyu Wave was a phenomenon sweeping across Asia but after being in Vietnam, I realized that Korean entertainment is far more popular than its Vietnamese counterpart. So, what's with the obsession? I read a few articles on the subject and it seems that part of it stems from the Vietnamese fixation on romance. There's no doubt that Korean men are portrayed as kings of romance in movies and the plots that Korean dramas are based on are always intense, though unrealistic, love stories. The Vietnamese are also attracted to the modern lifestyle portrayed in Korean media. Unlike American productions, Korean programs keep with traditional Eastern values, making them more appropriate for other Asian viewers.

What started as a fascination with Korea's media has led to an addiction with Korean products for Vietnamese people. In addition to clothing boutiques selling only Korean fashion, and salons offering the latest K-pop hair cut, cosmetic products made in Korea are all the hype. When browsing through the cosmetics isle at the store, I'm always surprised by the fact that certain goods use "Korean product" or "Made in Korea" as a marketing tactic. Beauty salons do the same thing, advertising that their facials or conditioning treatments are carried out using only the best Korean cosmetics and hair products.

Finally, the Korean food craze also seems to be catching on here in Vietnam. Korean restaurants are popping up everywhere, serving everything from bibimbap to galbi to naengmyeon. I've been to a few different restaurants and I have to admit, everything that I had tasted quite authentic. Bravo, Vietnam.

The love for all things Korean has made it cool for students to take interest in Korean studies. I've talked to a few Vietnamese people through the CouchSurfing website who have studied the Korean language after learning about the country through its media. Many of them hope to one day travel to Korea or even work there.

It's not clear if the Vietnamese obsession with Korean culture is everlasting love or mere infatuation. Media and fashion trends come and go, no matter where one is in the world. But, I have to admit, I'm quite thankful that my kimchi cravings can be satisfied quite easily here in Vietnam. And that I can see my beloved Lee Min Ho's beautiful face everywhere.

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Tiger Moms

Yesterday I got in touch with my former co-teacher at the hagwon (private academy) I most recently worked at in Seoul. I was curious about how my students were doing and how things were going at the school. They had just finished their end-of-the-year performance in which classes perform plays and dances for their parents. Honestly, I was a bit happy to have not been there for the preparation as practices are ridiculously strenuous on both the teachers and students. Children as young as 4 are forced to memorize lines and dance moves until they are learned perfectly. The end result is a grand one that acts as a showcase of the students' English skills that have developed over the year.

My co-teacher told me that she had been so angry after having preparing the script and choosing roles for the students when one of the grandmothers of a kid called complaining that her grandson had fewer lines than the narrator. Was this a surprise to me? Absolutely not. I had seen plenty of this type of behavior from parents- almost always the moms- over the years I taught in Korea. We used to joke about it in the office. Whenever a mom would call in making some crazy demand that her preschooler be tested more often or that her child be seated next to the teacher, my Korean co-workers would always roll their eyes and promise that they personally would never become a crazy Korean mom.

The fact is that Asian moms have been like this for some time now. They generally take a tough love approach to parenting, avoiding too much hugging or giving approval, demanding their child be the best of the best. When reading a news article today, I found that this has been a controversy in the American media lately over the release of a book on the subject and these particular moms have been branded. They go by, often self-proclaimed, the title "tiger moms."

I was surprised with my students' academic abilities from the moment I started teaching them. Instead of speaking to my 5 year old class (4 years Western age) in a slow, clear voice that I might have used at my previous school, I spoke to them in the same way I would talk to an American child of the same age. If they didn't understand a word I used, they would ask its meaning, and begin to use it later on in the day. I'd enter the classroom after lunch and while some students would be reading English children books effortlessly, others would be speaking the new phrases they learned in Chinese class. Still others would be drawing pictures with such artistic skill that even I couldn't produce anything close to what they were doing. "Damn," I often thought to myself. These kids were so far ahead of their Western counterparts.

From an early age, Korean children are pushed to be the very best in all that they do. My first graders often told me about their daily schedules: elementary school, English academy, math academy, taekwondo practice, and piano practice. By the time they get home, they eat dinner, do their homework, and it's off to bed. And that's just elementary school. The older they get, the more they are forced to study. I often saw high school kids sleeping on their books at Starbucks at 11PM on any given day. Study hall and tutoring classes go well into the late hours of the night, though the government has started to crack down on these private schools issuing fines. Fortunately for students, the Korean government has also finally put a halt to weekend schooling for all ages starting in March. Considering parents still force their children to attend private academies on the weekends, I don't think things will change too much.

It sounds rough. I know. But I have to admit that as a result of pushy parents and a society that demands education be a priority, Koreans are smart. They are artistic. They can sing and play instruments well. I envy them in a way. The country is also a lot safer than Western nations, as citizens learn early on how to function in society, work hard, and respect one another. As middle and high school students don't have time to be involved with drugs or alcohol, you don't see juvenile delinquents loitering around or pregnant teens or high school drop outs. I'm sure that they're there in small numbers, but you just don't see them. This is almost entirely a result of tiger parenting by Asian parents (in addition to some other aspects of Confucianism) and although Westerners may be hesitant to think that tough love results in anything good, they should come to Korea and see the exceptional traits of its citizens firsthand.

Tiger moms and Eastern style parenting are concepts that are common in Korean dramas, like "Secret Garden" and "Boys Before Flowers."

Yet, it's not always good. I also believe that children deserve to run around, be kids, and find themselves as individuals. So often Korean parents place emphasis on making their child fit in with a group that they ignore their child's individuality. I once had a student whose mother forced her to take traditional Korean dance and music lessons in addition to having private art, math, English, and Chinese lessons at home. When the child stated that she would rather take jazz dance lessons, her mother acted as if she didn't even hear her. This same mother (who I should mention was a former pageant queen) also often called her daughter hobac (pumpkin)- which is an insult meaning 'ugly' in Korea- and fat and made the daughter (who was 6, mind you) go on a diet. Occasionally, the daughter would act out, cry, or when studying, would pull out her eyebrow hairs if she became overwhelmed. A negative result of tiger parenting is that Korean children bottle up their feelings, unable to express themselves to their parents. This tends to carry on into their adulthood, as the Korean workplace demands long hours and top-notch performance. Korea may have very low crime rates, but their suicide rate is one of the highest in the world.

So, there are positive and negative aspects to Asian style parenting, as there are with Western parenting. However, Westerners would be smart to take on a bit of the tiger role when disciplining their kids instead of rejecting the concept of tough love all together. I've seen plenty of moms who try to be their kids' best friend and it never ends well. Sure, no system is perfect. Balance is key to anything in life and parenting is no different. As the world becomes more global, especially with economic powers transferring to the East, it'll be interesting to see if cultures will also combine.

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The Malaysian Melting Pot

Kuala Lumpur is a city of contrasts. Go there and find yourself in awe of architectural feats like the Petronas Towers. Walk some more and stumble upon stunning colonial buildings. Wander a bit further and end up in the middle of a rain forest. It's a place that keeps visitors curious, wondering what will be around the next corner. And like Kuala Lumpur's structure, the people of the city are just as diversified.

One of the things I was most looking forward to in traveling to Malaysia was being submersed in multiculturalism. The country is often described in tourism ads as "the best of Asia in a nutshell." And it's true. Malaysia is home to large Indian and Chinese populations in addition to ethnic Malays, creating an atmosphere that's anything but boring.

As soon as I arrived in KL, I headed to Petaling Street, the heart of Chinatown. It was a bit like I had expected it to be. Eager sellers displayed their wares and tantalizing aromas came from all sides of the path on which I walked. I caught bits of dialogue, the usual negotiations one might hear in any market anywhere in the world. But the vibe of the street was different. Here was a Chinatown that had been around a while. The storefronts were picturesque and small restaurants served up dishes that had been cooked the same way for multiple generations. I tasted a few different foods, all of which were fantastic, before heading back to my hotel to prepare for the next cultural day of my trip.

A parade in Malacca celebrates a Chinese holiday.

I didn't get the chance to go to Bricksfields, KL's Little India, one of the pioneer settlements that is now home to a large Indian community. I did, however, get to go to Thaipusam, which I blogged about previously. Considering there were thousands of Indians there, I felt as if I weren't in Malaysia at all. I also took a cooking class at my hostel, the Reggae Mansion, in which an Indian gentleman instructed me how to cook various Malaysian dishes, including a fish curry and a mutton curry. I was surprised to see how strongly Indian ingredients influence Malaysian food until I realized that the country is in fact in the middle of the former spice trade route.

The spices used during our Malaysian cooking class are the same spices used in many types of Indian food.

As I've been to quite a few Chinatowns in my time and I spent a summer in India, I was most interested in seeing the traditional Malay culture. There are still many indigenous groups and tribes-around 64 of them- living in the country, many of whom still follow traditional practices and customs. Unfortunately, since I didn't get to venture out into the villages and smaller towns of Malaysia, I didn't see too much of this. One thing that I was exposed to, however, was Islam.

Growing up in the US, I was exposed to the ridiculousness that is the American media. News broadcasts and various TV shows often portrayed Islam as an evil religion whose followers are brain-washed and backward. Also, being from a small town, I never met any Muslims so it was difficult to have my own opinions. Of course, as I got older, I learned not to believe everything I saw on TV. Still, I didn't know what to expect when I learned that Malaysia is a predominately Muslim nation.

One of the first things I noticed when I arrived in KL were the number of women wearing hijabs, the traditional head coverings worn by Muslim women and modest Muslim styles of dress in general. But, wait. These women were not just wearing a basic cut of fabric over their heads and shoulders. On closer observation, I noticed that many of the Muslim women were accessorizing their hijabs with strings of crystals hanging at the chin. I then started seeing others wearing sparkly broaches near the shoulder or large flower pendants by the forehead. I paid closer attention to stores and vendors selling hijabs and noticed mannequins advertising the latest trends. Back at the hotel, I curiously Googled "hijab fashion" to discover that there is an entire fashion sub-culture based on the hijab!! I was loving this.

I should also mention another time I was walking around the Kuala Lumpur City Center, a huge mall home to any store you can imagine. I was in the Bobbi Brown makeup store and saw a woman dressed in an abaya, the traditional black dress that covers everything but the woman's eyes which is commonly worn in countries like Saudi Arabia and Iran. With her Louis Vuitton in hand, and her husband at her side, she looked closely at the various shades of eyeshadow and powders before making a big purchase. Imagining her decked out in vintage Chanel underneath that black fabric, I began to see that in actuality, there's very little difference between us women of the world. Our desires and interests and wants are, in fact, the same.

Over the course of a few days, I visited some mosques. Before entering, I was kindly assisted in putting on the hijab and made small talk with the assistants. I was hesitant in admitting where I was from, as Muslims around the world know how they are portrayed in America, but I was honest (once) and was greeted as hospitably as I might be in the American South. I explored the Masjid Jamek, one of KL's oldest mosques which is built amongst palm trees and near the two rivers in which the city is named for. I also went to the Masjid Negara, a beautiful complex that can accommodate up to 15,000 worshipers. There, a kind older woman explained to me the history and basic tenants of Islam, as well as some of their customs, like ablution before prayer. Although only followers of Islam are allowed inside the prayer room, she explained everything about it to me from the outside. She pointed out the mihrab, an illuminated wall niche of every mosque that indicates the direction of the Kaaba in Mecca. Not once was she ever condescending or trying to convert me to Islam; her intentions were to simply show me the beauty of the mosque and share with me a bit about her religion.

The Masjid Jamek is settled in a grove of palm trees in the center of the city.


The Masjid Negara- or National Mosque- can accommodate up to 15,000 worshipers.

I ended my trip at the Islamic Arts Museum, an impressive building showcasing an even more impressive collection of Islamic arts. From intricately designed Qurans to beautiful traditional clothing to fascinating models of Islamic architecture throughout the world, I was able to see the artistic side of Islam.

Qurans on display at the Islamic Arts Museum in KL.

I was glad to be able to meet so many friendly, warm people during my trip in Malaysia. From the girls I oohed and aahed with over shoes to the people who went out of their way to help me find what I was looking for to some new friends I made over a shared love of 2PM and Korean dramas, I realized that people are just people. Religion and race don't matter. Unfortunately, not enough people in the world have the opportunity or the chance to realize that firsthand.

New friends I bonded with over a love of 2PM.

Though there is some discrimination that exists in Malaysia, the country, in general, is quite accepting of other cultures. Its citizens seem to get along quite well despite their differences and I believe that is to be admired. It was a fantastic country that opened my eyes and my mind to a lot. Plus, I got to see three cultures in one. And, who doesn't love that kind of travel deal?

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Thaipusam: No Pain, No Gain

At some point during a journey, it is inevitable that one is subjected to one of those "I'm not in Kansas anymore" moments that throws him or her into a realization that he or she has wandered far down that yellow brick road, no longer close to the normal or recognizable. I found myself having quite a few of those moments in Malaysia, though one day in particular had me thinking that I had traveled even further than Oz.

About a year ago, I was cleaning up my apartment, only half watching TV when I glanced up and noticed some very interesting images popping up on the screen. My attention was grabbed and I continued to watch the fascinating display of some sort of religious ceremony. Worshipers, who were pierced with hooks and carrying huge box-like displays walked in procession, some in trances, toward a huge cave. What was this festival? Where could it possibly be? I was curious. And I was going.

I soon learned that Thaipusam was a Hindu festival that celebrates the occasion when Parvati, a wife of Shiva, gave her son Murugan a spear so he could vanquish the demon Soorapadam, who had been tormenting all the good souls of the universe. Essentially, this commemoration is symbolic of good prevailaing over evil. Although this festival originated in Tamil Nadu, India, it is held in other areas where there are Tamil communities, including Malaysia. I booked a flight to Kuala Lumpur as soon as I found out that I would be in Vietnam during the festival.

I woke up around 5AM on the morning of the holiday. I hopped on the Kommuter train toward the Batu Caves and was pleasantly surprised to find that it wasn't as crowded as I expected it to be. While many participants had already begun the 4km procession from Chinatown at midnight, still others, like children and families, were going via bus or train. A few of the younger kiddos were nodding off during the ride as they held on to their bags of coconut milk that would be brought into the caves later in the morning.

The sun was just coming up as the train braked. The Batu Caves were still illuminated by floodlights. The sky was calm, starting to show the signs of daybreak. Yet, when I exited the train, I was greeted by a vision that I had not expected: a ferris wheel, cotton candy vendors, a booth selling fried god-knows-what. It was a carnival- right smack-dab in the middle of this holy and traditional religious procession. What the hell?! I'm still not sure if it was a permanent thing or if people had set up shop for the festival but it had kinda ruined the other-worldly experience for me.

Thaipusam attendants in procession to the Batu Caves.

Nevertheless, I kept walking, heading in the direction of the giant gold statue of Lord Murugan. As I approached the entrance to the caves, I came upon the procession of devotees. This is what I had come for and I watched in awe as they passed me. It was just like what I had seen on TV, but much more peaceful. Though the hooks that pierced their skin and the spikes through their mouths seemed painful, tranquility was present in their eyes, which were usually cast upwards on the statue of Murugan. There was also this soft, traditional Hindi music playing in the near vicinity, giving the scene some beautiful background music.

I observed devotees as they passed. Many carried containers of milk over their shaved heads. Others attached oranges to hooks that hung on their backs. Some put spears through their cheeks or tongues (a reminder of Murugan). There seemed to be chains and ropes everywhere. Yet the most impressive were those bearing intricately decorated canopy-like structures that seemed to weigh a few hundred pounds. All of these items are referred to as kavadis, and they are taken on either as a thank you for an answered prayer by Murugan or as a penance for past wrongdoings. The more pain endured, the more merit achieved.

There were three barricaded lines to/from the Batu Caves. One was an entrance for bearers, another was an entrance for the public and press, and the final was an exit. As I walked along with the public, I tried to stay close to the side, out of fear of a stampede... or something. This also gave me a good view of the devotees. Participants would begin chanting "Vel! Vel! Vel!" (Vel being the name of the spear used by Murugan) and others would begin going into a trance. The kavadi bearers would have to stop every so often and have their assistants rub out their calf muscles, which were shaking uncontrollably.

When I finally reached the top of the stairs, I started getting a bit worried as the crowds were getting larger and I was coming down with an uncharacteristic case of sudden-onset claustrophobia. I couldn't get a good view of the devotees once inside the cave, but I believe that they pour the milk over the statues of Murugan. I watched the Kavadi bearers have their hooks and spikes and other hardware removed while priests sprinkled (antiseptic?) ash over their wounds. Amazingly, I didn't see a drop of blood the entire day. As I wandered around for a bit, I noticed that quite a few people (devotees included) were staring at me and had their cameras pointed in my direction. Even in the midst of this unusual atmosphere, I was still the freakshow with my white skin. Go figure.

Inside the Batu Caves.

A kavadi-bearer with a vel-like spear through his tongue.



Devotees wait in line to give up their offerings.

I headed back down the stairs and wandered around a bit more before the heat got the best of me. The train ride home was hellish to say the least, as I had to wait forever in line to get a ticket then make my way through a crowd of pushy people to get on an already packed car. Standing in a stinky air of humanity in a car with no ventilation, I started to mutter curses in my mind. Then, I quickly thought back to what I had just seen the devotees do for thanks or forgiveness. Learning a lesson from them, and thankful for the opportunity of actually seeing such a sight, I wiped the negative thoughts out of my mind. After all, no pain, no gain, right?

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Same Same, But Different

McDonalds's. Dunkin Donuts. Pizza Hut. Burger King. Just a few names that one might associate with American fast food. And while it's true that these companies may have been born in the land of golden arches, today they can be found all over the world. When I first started traveling, I refused to enter a Mickey D's, in fear that it would disturb my cultural experience of whatever country I was visiting. Since then, I've learned that having a meal or two at American fast food joints overseas is, in fact, a cultural experience in itself. While fast food franchises usually serve up original items, like the Big Mac or cheese pizza, they will also offer dishes that accommodate the taste of its citizens. This is also true in Korea and since I've been here, I've had a lot of fun trying the unusual options.

McDonald's seems to be the most common foreign chain around the country and it was my safe haven when I first arrived in Korea without any language proficiency or knowledge of Korean food. I could easily point to a picture on the menu and my order was easily understood. The first time I saw the menu, however, I was a bit turned off by the Shrimp Burger. I suppose it is made similarly to our fish sandwiches at home, but for some reason the idea of shrimp mashed up and pressed together into a patty is just a tad repulsive to me. In the past couple years, I've eaten everything from fried crickets to live octopus to dog but for some reason or another, I still can't do the shrimp burger. What I do love to order, on the other hand, is the Shanghai Spice Chicken burger. A chicken breast (or random parts... it IS McDonald's!) is fried with various oriental spices, smeared with some mayo, topped with lettuce and tomato, and placed on a bun. While it's not too different from the average chicken sandwich, the spice is a tasty twist on the original.

Burger King's Bulgogi Burger is also an item distinctive to Korean fast food chains. Bulgogi is a traditional Korean dish of grilled sliced beef marinated in a sweet sauce. The restaurant uses the bulgogi sauce to give the burger a sweet flavor. I, myself, am not extremely fond of it, as there are very few sweet flavors that I like in a meal. Still, I can see how Koreans, or anyone with a sweet tooth, would favor the taste. Burger King also serves up patbingsu, a traditional Korean dessert of shaved ice topped with sweetened red beans and fruit. It's a strange way to follow up a burger set-uh (combo) but is tasty all the same.

Patbingsu is a tasty traditional Korean sweet that can be enjoyed at Burger King. Who knew?

Both Pizza Hut and Domino's also use bulgogi meat as a topping on many of their pizza variations; compared to other toppings, it's the most Western. Unlike corn. I'm not sure where they got the idea, but corn is a standard topping on almost all pizzas in Korea. I don't mind eating it, but I was quick to learn the phrase "ogsusu baegu, juseo" ("without corn, please"). It just feels like a bit of a culinary sin eating pizza with corn. Another weird, but surprisingly delicious topping is sweet potato. Whether it's stuffed in the crust or sits atop the cheese in slices, the flavor works quite well with tomato sauce and cheese. Fortunately, Parmesan cheese is available alongside Tabasco sauce (something I MUST have on my pizza these days) at pizza restaurants. And lest we forget the side of pickles that comes with each order. Oh, the pickles.

Having to pass Dunkin Donuts every morning on the way to work this past year was not good for my health. I made frequent stops for bagels with cream cheese and iced lattes. I also got a good laugh checking out the doughnut selection while I waited for my order. DD is consistent in producing some incredibly bizarre culinary creations ranging from stomach-turning to intriguing. The "Banana Filled" in the shape of a banana with yellow frosting seems tolerable enough, contrary to the "Kimchi Croquette" filled with the famous fermented cabbage. There are some doughnuts that are rice based (super chewy) and still others that are marketed to the health nut, like the vitamin doughnut (surrrrrre). I was most fascinated by the vegetable themed doughnuts, said to be made from carrot, broccoli, or spinach. For the sole purpose of blog research, I decided to try a few of them and was a bit amazed at their tastiness. After getting over the orange and green colors, I enjoyed their cakey texture and perfect amount of sweetness. My favorite was the carrot doughnut, as it was somewhat comparable to carrot cake, though the icing was lighter. Unfortunately these are no longer on the menu, but no worries... Dunkin Donuts has new creations all the time.

The Banana Filled, Kimchi Croquette, and Sweet Potato Stick Sand are all available at your local Dunkin Donuts. If you're in Korea, that is.

I'm not a huge fast food fan, but I will continue to be intrigued by the Korean adaptation of American fast food. It's been a fun aspect of traveling and a way to change things up a bit when bibimbap gets boring. So, the next time you are traveling and find yourself cringing at the uncanny menu choices at a foreign McDonald's, order the weirdest item. You might just be pleasantly surprised. If not, well, it's all a part of the adventure.

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